Respecting individuals, rather than relations is easier for me….

Over the years, I have always tended to love and respect individuals, but not relations. There are many people who do it just the other way around. If there happens to be a very close relative of mine, probably even a blood relation, who happens to have some serious drawbacks in behaviour and which I know is not good, I cannot develop any respect for him/her. The relation itself cannot command respect to me.

I am a man of principles and I feel that I do have a thorough understanding of what is fair and what is not. I have huge respect for my mother, and even if that lady had not been my mother, I still would have respected her as a person. That is what I mean. Few people are very close relatives of mine, but I hardly ever talk to them, because I do feel that they are not good enough to talk to. On the other hand, there are many people who are just acquaintances, but who have commanded a lot of respect from me over the years. Among them, a few of them are actually quite a few years younger to me. Eventually for me it is the person, and not his/her age or the relation we are into, which drives the depth of respect.

I have heard people who say that “I understand that my xxx relative has so and so defects, but I still love him/her deeply enough, and I cannot tolerate even a rude word directed at him/her, even though those words might be ultimate truth.” To me, such words are baffling. Some people keep defending the mistakes of their close ones. They just cannot accept the fact that right is always right and wrong is always wrong, no matter who it comes from. I understand that it feels bad when somebody chastises your loved ones, but you should also analyze the reasons for their doing so. Instead of defending their loved ones in public, some people should go and rectify their mistakes in the confines of a drawing room. Sometimes it works.

At the end of it all, I feel that nobody should be biased towards any relationship. If one feels that their loved ones are not doing the right thing, especially if they are repeating the same rudeness or mistakes in behaviour, then appropriate reactions should be given. Blind defense does not help anybody. Ultimately it is about shunning the path of evil and treading the path of truth. Parashurama killed his father, Krishna killed his cousin Shishupala in a packed court and Arjuna demolished the Kauravas almost single handedly in Kurukshetra. Hence, the sky would not crash on our heads if we go against some of our loved ones, who have forgotten what righteousness is all about.