Why do people respect me?

Sometimes I wonder that, if I had passed my Masters in engineering from another college, instead of an IIT, then how would life have treated me right now? Would I have commanded the same respect from society? Sometimes I also wonder that as a human being how good or bad I am actually. What are the three things that people respect me or love me for? Is it because I am an IIT ian, is it because of some of my individual qualities, is it just because I am the son of a very socially venerated and loved couple, or is it a combination of just everything?

My gumption has never given me a definitive answer to this question. I am not sure whether I should ever be thinking about such redundant issues, but a deeper dive into oneself obviously opens a can of worms inside the mind. A lot of questions keep cropping up that may not have a direct impact on daily life.

Irrespective of your actual nature, pragmatic diplomacy sees you through almost all of the time. However, the kind of attributes that civilized society looks for in an individual, to treat him with respect even when he is not any more, is what has enthralled me for quite some time. Being subservient would win you sympathy and love but would allow people to get on top of you very easily. Being pernicious does not help either. Temerity would help you to quell your competitors, but would create more enemies than friends. Smugness may win you adorations among one set of an audience but chastisement among another set.

Most attributes I just mentioned are contradictory to possess and hence confounding. The easiest thing to do however is to keep it simple, be good unconditionally, and, protest against evil in the rudest possible terms. Some questions have no answers and it is better if we do not search for them either. As long as we do not hurt people in any way anytime, we are fine. Rest I leave to God.

Identify special talents within yourself and ignore illogical criticism…

Broadly speaking, there are two kinds of talents that any human being can possess in life. One is that of creative performances, which cannot be taught to anybody beyond a certain degree. These include fluent speaking and writing skills, skills of aptitude and intuition, skills of expression, skills of cleanliness and organization, skills of empathy and understanding and the skill to make people smile. Let us call these attributes Talent Type A.

In another type, you can teach a person to do a given thing in a particular way every time, and through hours or days of practice, he/she masters it. Such things include singing, dancing, driving a vehicle, operating any other machine or electronic gadget, cooking, solving mathematics problems in school, sewing, and building vocabulary in one or more languages. Let us call these attributes as Talent Type B.

If given a choice, I would always wish to possess the Type A talents, because you cannot master those even after years of practice and lecture. These are basically habits or caliber that any man is born with. I have also noticed another trend. You tend to get criticized more often for the lack of Type B talents. People who do the criticism fail to understand that, for example, a person who is not a good cook can become one in a few months of practice. However, a person who cannot express a given thought in proper words can never be taught to do so, no matter how much training you impart to him/her.

Sometimes in my free time, I reflect on what kind of criticism I have faced all throughout my life. At that point of time, I felt that those harsh words were justified because I was really weak in certain things. Now if that happens, I smile to myself, because those weaknesses have been converted into strengths after hours of dedication. Most of the time, if your are really talented then you would find that in the ultimate analysis, you possess most of both Type A and Type B talents, but the so-called “experts” can only boast of the latter.

However you should never react and tell them “Hey buddy, it’s a pity that you cannot write even a paragraph in English properly.” That goes against the culture of champions. This attitude of restraint and humility is what separates the good from the great ones. Besides, empty vessels tend to make more noise anyway, what is the big deal about it? The thing is they know that they can never be as good as you are, and hence they try to vent their frustrations by throwing harsh words at you. That’s the way the world lives day after day.

Forget the Olympic bid, nurture champions for the future…..

After a grand hosting of the Commonwealth Games (CWG) 2010, in spite of its innumerable administrative loopholes, India has set its eyes on bidding for the 2020 Olympic Games. The outstanding performances of many of its athletes further strengthen its confidence in doing so. However, put bluntly and blatantly, India is still not ready to bid for the Olympics.

The mess that we created in organising the CWG 2010, which is far less complex and gargantuan an exercise than the Olympics, clearly shows that the bidding would be a waste of time, energy and money. A solitary individual gold medal in 88 years of participation proves that it is imperative that we use all our resources to nurture champions for the London Olympics in 2012. The annals of Indian sports writing have been full of complaints about the system, corrupt administrators and lack of talent among athletes. Every four years, it has become a collective national ritual to blame everyone else when found exposed badly in front of the global mirror of the Olympics, only to move on and repeat the same catharsis four years later.

A bid for the Olympics, to me, is another step towards clapping our hands in glee and return to our daily dose of cricket once the euphoria recedes. We should look to use the medals won in CWG 2010 as a catalyst to help correct years of frustration at India’s poor sporting performances and result in the creation of sporting infrastructure for future generations of athletes.

The Asian Games 1982 which was held in Delhi unfortunately could not leave behind a positive legacy in terms of nurturing an all-pervasive sports culture in India. Against such a backdrop, the CWG should stand up and set an example. We do not need another mega event on Indian soil so quickly, but we do need a set of champions across all sporting disciplines over the next five years, so that people do not deride us when we do bid for the Olympics sometime after 2020.

Filtering out good moments of the past gives you bliss…

I had written in one of my earlier posts that a loving wife is God’s most precious gift. The reason for that is, not only does she shower you with love and affection, but she also gives you peace of mind and she boosts your self-confidence. One of the main ways that she does this so easily is by helping you to learn to filter out good moments of the past and remember them.

If you are able to it, then you would never be depressed in your life. You would not be jealous of the happiness of others, you would not frown unnecessarily at your wife, nor would you hamper your professional performance by staying grumpy. At the same time, you would create more happy moments for yourself and your family. So it is a win-win situation for you.

There are people like me who have used their sharp memorising skills in excellent fashion for academics and professional achievements. However, it is this same attribute that creates mayhem when you want to forget some bitter memories. This aspect has also been covered in one of my posts. However, there are not many fortunate people around who have the blessing of a fiancée like Kuhu, who is always trying to help me to get rid of bitter experiences and help me smile every time. The results are finally starting to show, and it is a feeling from within.

In few of the many days that we have spent together, there have been traces of misunderstandings here and there, as is common in any relationship. However the great thing is she has made me forget all that and keeps on reminding me only the sweet memories, the laughter and the jokes. I am slowly beginning to discover the secrets of true happiness, and that is all because of her untiring and fructuous efforts. She has been subservient in her presence but domineering in her impact, and that is where she has made herself special.

It is not that I never have a modicum of negative thoughts now, but I have definitely learnt to differentiate the diamond from the glass. It has given me bliss and peace of mind. I can now enjoy every moment, even the dull ones which would have normally angered me, with exuberance and remembrance of treasured experiences.

The Grand Bold Man of Indian Sport…..

In the Indian sporting arena, if you think of passion for playing for the country, enthusiasm, fitness levels and involvement in his game, you would not struggle to find the only name that fits all these attributes. Leander Paes, even at 37, remains the same, as if he has only just begun playing tennis.

I would not list down his achievement over the past 20 years here. That is for everybody to see, especially the innumerable upsets that he has created in Davis Cup, and his exploits in Men’s Doubles with Mahesh Bhupathi. However, what set him apart from the others of his ilk are his indomitable spirit and his desire to excel in whatever he does.

I had read an article long back about the Barcelona Olympics in 1992, where India had a terrible outing. The Chef-de-Mission for India during those Games, the late Mr Ashok Ghosh, had said that Paes, who was only 19 that time, was the only Indian athlete who had self-belief and was showing passion on the field. This in itself was a tremendous certificate.

Leander has always given his best performances whenever he has played for India – Davis Cup, Olympics and Asian Games. It seemed that for most people Davis Cup put pressure on their shoulders, hindering them from a good performance. However, for Leander it put pressure under his shoulder, which propelled him to lift himself. At a time when Indian athletes were not known for their spirit, he inspired, and there lied his greatness. He is still playing extremely good tennis at the ATP circuit and continues to do India proud at the world stage. Youngsters have a lot to learn from him.

If you hurt somebody, then have patience and mend his heart….

In my previous post, I had written about how harsh criticism, especially from somebody who you love and respect, can be so damaging to you psychologically. It would really test your self-belief to the brim to get back to your normal confident self. In that post I had talked from the perspective of the victim of the criticism. Today, I would say something from the point-of-view of the perpetrator.

If you have criticized somebody dear to you very harshly, hurt his/her ego in a fit of anger in spite of loving and respecting him/her under normal circumstances, then you know that it would be very hurting to him/her. In that scenario, he/she may react in many ways. He/she may hurt you back, may shout at you for no reason or, if that person is extra sensitive, then he/she may not even talk to you for a while. That period would be very difficult for you to handle.

Under such circumstances, I would say it would be best for you to speak to him/her in very sweet and friendly terms, and have some patience. Even if he/she does not pick up your phone, or does not reply to your sms, or declines to meet you in person, just persist with your sweetness. Express feelings which suggest that you are really sorry for what you have done. Sending ecards, cute sms, or whatever that person likes is a very good way to mend hearts. A very natural feeling for you is to get frustrated because you cannot improve his/her mood after the incident, but you should never indulge in it. Remember that all your efforts are towards getting back the person you love so deeply. With time, even the other person would realize that whatever you had said was not meant to hurt him/her but only an expression of your bad mood on that particular moment. He/she will forgive you eventually and things would get back to normal.

However the lesson to be learnt from such incidents is that you should never hurt the ego of your loved ones, and make general statements about their character, even at extreme situations. For example, you can always say that “You have behaved very badly today” but you should never say that “You are very rude and insensitive.” Sensitive individuals with a high degree of self-esteem tend to remember such words for a long time, which might be detrimental to any relationship.

Harsh criticism tests your self-belief…

Holding on to self-belief when faced with a barrage of criticism is the virtue of the wise and the trait of a tough mind. When you begin to understand yourself well, you know what you are good at and what you are not good at. You understand your strengths and weaknesses to a large extent. In such a scenario, if anybody tries to claim that you are not good at some particular thing, which you know you are good at, then that can be very insulting and hurting.

I have faced such scenarios a few times in life, the latest one being very recently. I can tell you that if such harsh criticism comes from somebody you love and respect, then it is very difficult to accept. This is all the more true for people like me who have a high degree of self-esteem. It is very easy to accept criticism of any of your weakness, but never so of your strength. However, if you are a mentally tough individual, you tend to put such baseless allegations behind you and move on. I have always felt that the best way to answer criticism, from anybody, is to keep the mouth shut and to let performances speak. If somebody tells me that I lack confidence, which is totally a false statement, the only way that I can prove that person wrong is by being myself and staying confident in whatever I do every time.

The one thing I believe is that, most of the time, people criticize you harshly because they are jealous of your success. They want you to feel depressed and lose your self-confidence. They are stopping your way by baseless loose talk because you are on the right track and they feel insecure. The best way to counter it is never to lose your confidence and self –belief, no matter what they say, and carry on with what you do best. If you keep doing well, all people who had earlier made a mockery of you or insulted you will die to meet you and show you respect.

I have heard stories about how much Tagore was not given his due respect at one point in his life by the people of the West. He was sharply criticized and some people even went to the extent to say that Tagore cannot write even a line of poetry. That is why when he had received the Nobel Prize in 1913 for Gitanjali, he had written a song in Bengali “Ei Monihar Amai Naahi Shaje.”, which was a humble self recognition that “I am not worthy of such high rewards.” My point is, if people can show disrespect to a genius like Tagore, they can do so to you as well. You may not win a Nobel Prize to shut their mouths, but you can certainly lead a confident and successful life by never letting go of your self-belief.

KBC has brought back old memories…

The iconic Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC) episodes, in its entire new avatar, are back on Indian television sets. The difference is however that Amitabh Bachchan himself has grown ten years older since he appeared first time in the show, and of course the channel in which the show is aired is different. Although KBC had launched two more versions, I was not part of the audience to these. Two days back, I was witnessing KBC ten years after the first time it was masterminded by Siddhartha Basu in the year 2000.

I remember, back in 2000 KBC had created a huge hype and fan following because it was one of the first reality-shows on Indian television. Besides that, the curiosity that Amitabh Bachchan created was immense. It was after a long hiatus that he was being seen on the screen, and the first time on small screen. I was just a year into college that time and the excitement was even more. Every weekday at 9 pm, Maa, Baba, Dada, Thakuma and myself used to gather in our drawing room, leaving aside everything starting from studies to gossip to kitchen. It was a true family gathering. Every question asked on the show was discussed and we used to fight over the answers that were displayed on screen. If Baba said “Option B tai thik”, I used to oppose and opine that “Na go, Option A tai hobe.” Maa used to get irritated sometimes and shouted “Uff, tora ektu chup korbi ebar, ektu shunte dibi amai?”Every correct answer was cheered as well, by all five of us.

I remember once that a person from Kolkata won Rs 50 lakhs on the show and that was the highest winning cash prize that time. Till that time nobody had reached the magic figure of Rs 1 crore. The excitement that we were feeling for that gentleman, even though we would not get a penny of that, was amazing. KBC had become religion to the middle class household.

Ten years on, as I have started viewing the KBC again, quite a few things have changed in my personal life as well. Baba is no more, Maa does not enjoy such shows anymore, Dada has got married and is about to become a father in a months time, we have shifted into our new flat, Thakuma is suffering from incessant memory losses and I am staying alone in Bangalore. The moments of a hilariously filled drawing room are only in my memory. Right now, it is only I, and my empty drawing room here in Bangalore who absorb the special TV show, which had given our family one more reason to smile ten years back.

This Durga Puja was extra special…

It was only yesterday that I came back to Bangalore after spending five days in Kolkata. The festival of Durga Puja had engulfed the minds of millions of Bengalis, both here and abroad, during this period. The crowded streets, the highly innovatively designed pandals, the “Bonedi” pujas, 24 hour live TV coverage by different channels and the worship ritual itself were enthralling, as they are every year. This year however, was extra special.

Normally when I am in Kolkata during the pujas, I spend a lot of time hopping the pandals throughout the city. This time, it was a lot different. Barring one day (Ashtami) when I spent almost the entire day in Kuhu's house, I was with Kuhu alone, away from the crowd, away from the madness and away from gazing eyes and curious smiles. This puja allowed me to come even closer to Kuhu emotionally. We spent a lot of time together talking, kidding, laughing and of course sometimes fighting too! However, every moment was special.

I also had a rare opportunity to witness the puja in Kuhu’s home - the respected “Chatu Babu-Latu Babur Bari” at Beadon Street on Ashtami. I have always enjoyed the pujas in a “Bonedi Bari”, which are traditional and orthodox households of Kolkata with a true flavour of Bengal. People of north Kolkata always give you a feeling of heritage, a feeling of pride and happiness that comes from being a Bengali. The traditional attire that the family members adorn themselves with, and the hospitality they provide is amazing. On top of that there is an ownership and intimacy in the way that they conduct the pujas. That is really pleasant to the eyes and senses of any true Bengali.

Kuhu and myself spent the last Nabami evening together on the banks of the Ganges in Baghbazar. The curve that the river takes towards Howrah from the Dakshineswar side is just amazingly picturesque. Looking at that, you never seem to get lost for words, and we never let that happen. Finally at 8pm, when we thought that we should turn towards home, it was so painful.

She could not to come to the airport to see me off the next day. Hence the last time I saw her face was at 9 pm on Nabami night, at the junction of CR Avenue and Beadon Street. Devotees wish their mother Durga good-bye with tears of joy on Vijaya Dashami. However, there were two lesser mortals standing on the mouth of an alley in north Kolkata, one day before, bidding each other’s idols goodbye with sobbing hearts, marking the end of a wonderful and memorable stretch of five days.

Celebrating 100 steps to Unleashing Myself……

It might be trivial to many, absurd to some and inconsequential to a few, but the 100th post for my blog “Unleashing Myself” is very special to me. These are little milestones that I have always cherished and this one was no less. A hundred articles that were posted by me over the last three months have helped me to understand myself even better. It has also given me confidence that I can express my opinions reasonably well in words. I have grown beyond just writing testimonials for my friends in orkut, and adding good captions to all the photographs that I have uploaded in my profile.

I had never written, for any purpose, so extensively before the creation of my blog. This was a major reason that in spite of the journey having its ups and downs, it was very satisfying indeed. During these 100 steps, if so I may call it, I have written about issues, which I have had strong and intense feelings for. I have talked about the most precious individuals in my life – Kuhu, and Maa; I have talked about how much I miss Baba who passed away two years back; I have talked about burning social issues; I have talked about the institution of marriage; I have talked about some very important behavioral aspects that any individual should develop; I have talked about sport; I have also expressed myself about some of the greatest souls that have done India proud over a period of time – Tagore, Ray and Kishore Kumar; I have penned two short stories on a romancing couple who are having a turbulent relationship; and last but not the least, I have expressed some things about myself as well – how I have managed to stay alone all this while, how much I miss Kolkata, how much I have enjoyed life at IIT, what is the vision that I have for my future and of course my experiences of bachelorhood and staying alone.

Usually I used to write one post per day for my blog, but there have been days when I have not been able to gather my thoughts and hence did not write anything. Kuhu has been a real inspiration for me during this period. In fact, she was the only one who used to give me daily feedback about the quality of my writing, the topics themselves and, of course, some additional comments that she might have had. There were a few topics that were suggested by her also. Along the way, I have received constructive feedback about my blog from quite a few people. I have really enjoyed all of that.

Through my blog, as I mentioned earlier, I have been able to express all my feelings that I might not have done through speech. I have always enjoyed writing and I have always tried to keep my posts simple and easy to understand. The intention has never been to show off my English vocabulary to the audience, but it has always been my endeavor to express a given idea in the most appropriate form thorough effective use of the language. I have always believed that the best way to capture interest of any reader is to use simple language so that people do not need a dictionary when they do read my posts. That is the best way to reach out to the masses. However, unknowingly sometimes, the language has been a bit esoteric, and I really apologize to all readers for that.

Quite a few optimistic well wishers have suggested to me that in the future, if I do get sacked from an engineering job, I can very well turn out to be a writer! Comparisons have been made to Chetan Bhagat, who is also one such individual who gave up a lucrative engineering-management career for his passion towards writing. Right now, I must say, that such contemplations are far fetched. However, I would definitely continue to pursue my interest in writing through my blog, and then take life from there. Hope that all respected elders, Kuhu, Maa and my friends would always stand by me and shower me with blessings, love and goodwill, as they have done till now, to help me continue on this sojourn.

We have mastered the art of forgetting…….

The week gone by proved that how short public memory can be. It showed that even the biggest traumas are not indelible, and can be wiped out by new events. You got the feeling that an entire nation has hit the delete button on their memory simultaneously. Let us take the Commonwealth Games (CWG). Today we celebrate the Games and look forward to winning medals so that it can be a befitting reply to our history. The hatred against the British that fuelled our freedom struggle has long vanished. We have forgotten the Jallianwala Bagh massacre and many other atrocious incidents. However we do remember the trains, schools, colleges, post offices, churches, the architecture and the English language that the British had left behind. The latter has in fact enabled us to open up to the modern world, to science and technology, which we would be forever indebted to them for.

Now, take the Ayodhya verdict. Even before it was announced last week, we knew that whatever happens, India has moved on from 1992. In less than two decades, both Hindus and Muslims have set aside the contentious issue that killed thousands of men, women and children. Despite all efforts by certain political parties to keep the issue alive and sore, it is now dead. Everybody, particularly the young yearn for peace and progressiveness today.

Coming back to the CWG, I am sure that after two weeks of hysteria and India’s gold medal rush, we will forget Suresh Kalmadi and the most shameful and corrupt set of events that preceded the CWG. That our collective memory is getting shorter and shorter is also exemplified by the fact that the Pakistani contingent at the CWG got the biggest ovation after the Indians in the opening ceremony. It amazed me that, we speak so bitterly against Pakistan on every international platform for exporting terrorism to India and destabilising Kashmir, yet we love their sportspersons so much, their actors, singers and even their Page 3 people.

I am not surprised either at the fact that a nation which once hated Mohammad Azharuddin would vote him back as an MP; or in fact an Ajay Jadeja would be a cricket analyst in one of the leading TV channels even after the ignominy that he was handed over by the BCCI. What about the four wrestlers and the two athletes who failed the CWG dope test month? They are all back in the Indian contingent once the CWG has started. After all, we are implementing the first principles of our holy book – forgive and forget.

Mohali Test Match has really been refreshing to all fans…..

In one of my earlier posts I had written about the fact that Test Cricket needs some serious rejuvenation through creative rules and innovative administration. Well, if we keep having Test Matches like the one just concluded between India and Australia two days back, then we do not need to change anything. This Test match has proved that Test Cricket is alive and kicking.

This match can boast of quite a few special components to it – one of the closest finishes in the history of the game, a riveting display of talent by both sides, an epic battle between the two best sides in the world and of course a war of words on the field. However, perhaps most importantly, it was a palate cleanser. After the sordid match fixing allegations and counter allegations in England, India’s last gasp victory was an opportune reminder of the spectacle that the game can provide to all its fans.

The occasion was also a timely reminder of why Test Cricket is still considered rightly as the pinnacle of the sport. With its fluctuating fortunes that included at least four reversals in momentum, its period of consolidation succeeded by phases of frenetic play and individual contests, this Test Match provided a rhythm, a gathering and release of tension, that the shorter formats cannot hope to match.

For this tour the itinerary has already been fixed. However for future Australian tours to India, BCCI should definitely consider to shelve bland ODI fixtures in favor of an extended Test Match series of four or five matches. India and Australia have never produced a dull match and as two giants of the game they would definitely provide the much-needed fillip to cricket’s recent crisis of credibility.

Mahalaya has always been special…

Today was Mahalaya, the day which marks the start of “Debi Paksha”, a 15 day lunar period culminating on a full-moon day on Kojagori Lakshmi Puja, according to the Hindu calendar. Within these two weeks, Bengalis celebrate their most coveted festival of Durga Puja. In effect, Mahalaya marks the advent of the mood of Durga Puja. Hence this day has always aroused special feelings in me.

When I used to stay in Kolkata, I always started the day of Mahalaya by listening to the immortal voice of Birendra Krishna Bhadra. His soaring recitation of Mahishasura Mardini (Annihilation of Mahishasura, the Buffalo Demon), which is a collection of shlokas and songs broadcast by the All India Radio (AIR, Kolkata) from 4 am in the dawn of Mahalaya for two hours, has always been and would always be one of the best pieces of rendition that any Bengali would ever listen to.

Unfortunately, since 2005, I have never had the good fortune of listening to this grand piece of music because I have moved out of Kolkata. However, today was different simply because Maa was present here in Bangalore and she never wants to miss Mahalaya on AIR. Hence I decided to exercise my volition and download the piece from the net well in advance and play it on this auspicious day. When I started played it exactly at 5 am, it felt as if I have gone back to Kolkata; the feeling was extraordinary. One golden voice of Bhadra totally negated the aspect of geography and location in my life.

Suddenly I started feeling that Durga Puja is round the corner, a feeling which in normal circumstances would have hardly crossed my mind, if I had not listened to the recitation. The propinquity that I have towards my roots, in spite of a physical distance from my birthplace, became prominent today.

The one thing that I have missed today though is gazing at Mother Ganges on this day, where people perform Tarpan Rituals for their deceased ancestors. It is truly an endearing site. On top of that, the sheer view of the serene and pristine Ganges with sunlight glittering on the waters is a pleasure to behold anytime. Even then, after a long long time I can say that, although I have had to attend office here today, Mahalaya has struck all the right chords in my life.It was special indeed.

India has to stand up against child abuse…..

Distractions of the ongoing violence in Kashmir, and the skeletons falling out of the closet of the CWG have led us to almost forget the shocking incidents of child abuse that have rocked our country. In Delhi, a school van driver allegedly raped, sodomised and drugged three children aged between 8 and 12, who were entrusted to his care, for a period of 18 months. We have given no attention and exposure to this heinous act.

There has always been a general public reluctance to confront the entire issue of child abuse, which to me is the most repugnant and unforgivable of crimes, even more so than murder and rape. In our country, a child, in the form of Bal Krishna and Bal Ganesha, is worshipped. Such detestable acts against such innocent beings are absolutely criminal. In the western world, even the Catholic Church has been shaken at its roots by the exposure of widespread paedophilia amongst its clergy, but in India, we seem deliberately to look away from this most shameful of perversions,and turn a blind eye to it.

Although child abuse is horrifyingly common in India, it has been criminally underplayed here too. Sexual abuse apart, children here are also subject to economic necessities which compel them to do hard manual labour, often in hazardous and brutal conditions, in order to survive. It has become a very common sight indeed that children are begging in the streets and I am very sure that they are made to do the same by some heartless and ruthless thugs.Although India has the RTI Act and the largest number of anti-child labour laws than any other country in the world, it also has the largest number of child workers.

It is time we step up our conscience and vigilance too, start implementing the plethora of regulations that already exist prohibiting such disgraceful and cowardly acts towards infants, and stop the future of our country from being brutalized, sodomised and tortured.

Money and fame should never carry our cricketers away…

Young Indian cricketers of the past two decades have miserably failed to a significant extent on money handling matters, as well as in matters of keeping their foot firmly to the ground when financial offers are just too lucrative. The monetary incentive that the young fellows receive for playing a Test match, an ODI and a T20 match are just phenomenal. Add to it the IPL madness and the Champions League T20. The commercial endorsements are additional. There are many cricketers who debut at the age of 20-23, and at such an age, if you are paid so much, then you are bound to lose your head.

The only cricketer who has been an exception to this thumb rule has been Sachin Tendulkar. Even after he has achieved so much for 20 years, even after Sir Don Bradman had compared Sachin to none other than himself, he is still as modest as a child. That is why he is still scoring centuries whereas somebody like a Yuvraj Singh is struggling even to make it to the Indian squad, forget the starting line-up. I mean, Yuvraj is a classic example of what one should not do when he is doing well. Instead of concentrating on the game itself, I feel the fame and the glory just carried him away until the latter got the better of him. Similar is the case with Sania Mirza. She was so carried away by the glamour and glitz of the Page 3 magazines that she forgot the game, which had catapulted her to stardom a few years back. Now there is nobody to cajole her except a defamed Pakistani cricketer. Sachin has never allowed that to happen to him though.

Athletes from other disciplines from our country are never exposed to so much money so quickly, although sometimes they achieve a lot more than cricketers. That is why they are much more consistent in their performances. Viswanathan Anand has been the World Champion in chess for so many years now, but he maintains such a low profile. It is really worth emulating. In women’s boxing, MC Mary Kom has won the World Championship for 5 times in a row in her weight category. Leander Paes and Mahesh Bhupathi have continued to make India proud on the tennis courts year after year. Saina Nehwal, although she is just 20, is a role model for me. No matter how many tournaments she keeps on winning, she is so disciplined and modest. The kinds of words she utters in interviews are so refreshing. You feel that here is an young girl who is only concerned about her badminton and not about which brand she is endorsing.

I feel that cricketers should always take a lesson or two from other sportspersons in our country as well. In that case we would not lose talented cricketers from performing consistently at the international level. The BCCI should also conduct money-handling courses in the NCA for the young budding cricketers of our country, so that they do not get used to flash-in-the-pan performances and do not get carried away with money and fame. This kind of initiative is highly imperative in the current sporting scenario in our country.

Team sport creates tremendous bonding…

If you happen to be working with a group of people with whom you do not bond well at all, with whom you have constant bitter altercations or differences of opinion which turn sour, then engaging in team sports with them is the solution to your problem. There are many companies who organize such team sports as part of their HR initiatives to build team spirit. Believe me, it works miraculously well.

When I joined GE a few years back, as any new joinee would, I did not interact with too many people. There were around 75 people in our team then, and it was simply not possible to talk to and be friendly to every one of them. However, in the course of time, I have participated in quite a few tournaments like cricket, football and volleyball, which are team sports and require team spirit to succeed. On the field, you always want to win and you do not care whether you get along with a guy personally, if he happens to be in your team in the sport. You want to help each other out so that your team wins.

In doing so, you subconsciously develop a bonding with different persons, which actually sustains itself in your workplace as well. This is of tremendous value when you are into some project together. You tend to remember all the good times that you must have had on the field, the strategies that might have won you a point or a match, and the enjoyment you must have had after defeating the opposition. This makes to actually fulfill your technical deliverables far better than when you do not have any team building exercise. This was how we developed camaraderie among students of different departments and hostels when we used to be in IIT. That is why they say that sport is a great leveler as well as a great uniter.

Ray’s characterisations were unique and extraordinary….

If I am not wrong, Satyajit Ray has directed around 35 films and 2 documentaries. I have not had the good fortune to view all of them. However, the one thing which has amazed me about all of Ray’s films that I have watched, apart from his rare ability of uncluttered storytelling, is his unique characterisations.

The first character that comes to mind is that of Lalmohan Ganguly under the sobriquet of Jatayu, which was enacted by Santosh Dutta in the Feluda films. The character was neither total comedy, nor was it complete austerity. It did not bore the audience with foolish jokes, but enthralled them with witty humour. In 1996, Sandip Ray tried Rabi Ghosh, Anup Kumar and Bibhu Bhattacharya in the role of Jatayu, but all of them failed miserably. They failed to understand what the character was all about although they were outstanding actors in their own right. This exemplifies the genius of Ray in choosing actors for his characters.

The amount and clarity of thought that went into Ray’s characterisations can be gauged from the fact that he used Uttam Kumar, the best actor that Bengali cinema has ever produced, in just two of his films. Suchitra Sen never acted in any of his films. It is not that Sharmila Tagore, Aparna Sen and Madhabi Mukherjee were better actresses than Suchitra, but the fact was that Satyajit Ray did not ever think of reputations, but did think of the impact that the actor would have in playing a particular character on screen. That is why he has managed to create immortal characters like Maganlal Meghraj (Utpal Dutta), Gupinath and Baghanath (Tapen Chatterjee and Rabi Ghosh respectively), and Prodish Mitter (Soumitra Chatterjee).

Nobody can forget the impact that Dhritiman Chatterjee had in just five minutes of screen time in Agantuk, or the magic that Tulsi Chakrabarty and Utpal Dutta had created in Porosh Pathor and Agantuk respectively. There were many outstanding actors and actresses in those days, but I cannot think of anybody else who could have enacted those characters any better than the names I have mentioned.

I mean, people like Tapen Chatterjee, Dhritiman Chatterjee, Pradip Mukherjee (Jana Aranya), Mamata Shankar (Shakha Proshakha, Agantuk), Swatilekha Chatterjee (Ghare Baire, Kamu Mukherjee, Haradhon Banerjee and Shailen Mukehrjee were superstars in their own right, but they have been immortalised by Ray. Such was the greatness of the man that he could transform even lesser actors into outstanding performers, and one would never be able to reproduce them on screen again, apart from ray himself. That is why he was the greatest film maker that India has ever seen.

Media should be more responsible…..

Media hype on different issues, sometimes even before events occur, can really put you off your senses as it is such a potent medium of communication. Sometimes I feel that issues should not be blown out of proportion. It may wreak havoc even in places where peace would have been a certainty. Media can make a break a life. It may praise people unnecessarily and prevent them from sustaining brilliance; it may even rebuke innocent people and inflict permanent damage as well.

Before the Ayodhya verdict was declared a couple of days back, from almost a fortnight before that, there was such a huge anticipation that was created, that the government was forced to deploy even IAF choppers, leave alone the army and paramilitary forces in sensitive areas of the country. However, in Ayodhya itself, the ground situation was perfectly normal throughout. Just because of the media hype, schools, colleges and offices were forced to shut down for 48 hours. It was totally uncalled for.

Last year when the swine flu epidemic broke out in India, you could not open the newspaper or switch on a TV channel. They were spreading panic. You felt afraid even to touch your family members. When a source finally revealed the miniscular proportion of patients affected by swine flu compared to diseases like malaria and cholera, for which no panic is ever created among the public, you felt the redundancy of the entire exercise.

The CWG fiasco was blown out of proportion. It is true that the organizing committee did not conduct the preparations of the games well, but a blatant exposure of the shortcomings, printing pictures of filthy toilets may have been avoided. It just created a gloomy image of India globally. Issues could have been resolved internally. At the end of the day, the CWG 2010 would be held successfully anyway, but the media could have at least controlled some damage.

There have been so many instances throughout history where a bit more restraint by the media would have been so handy to prevent extreme unrest and inconvenience. Terrorists, who deserve nothing but whiplashes, get so much global attention just because of the media, but we forget birthdays of freedom fighters like Bhagat Singh and Jatin Das in the process, which is a shame. Hope that in the years to come, our media, which is so powerful, would show some responsibility as well, and use their influences constructively.