Some relationships, sometimes, make you feel shockingly helpless. The bonds are so strong that you cannot let them go, but at the same time you are frustrated that they are not on the path of truth, righteousness and self-dignity.As an individual, I strongly uphold my self-esteem and principles. Hence it becomes extremely difficult to handle a situation, where, my loved one keeps compromising on these attributes, and most importantly, never listens to my words of abandoning such cowardly acts inspite of suffering immensely for this folly.
A scenario arises where your loved one is complaining to you about his/her sufferings in life, you have the solution to the malady, you provide that to him/her, but he/she is not strong enough to implement that solution and end the suffering. It is very frustrating and infuriating for you in such a circumstance. Neither can you abandon your loved one with his/her problem, nor can you find peace with yourself by solving the problem.
In the Mahabharata, Bhishma had asked for the remedy to his woes to Lord Krishna. He had pleaded enlightenment on what is the right path for him – to provide moral and armed support to the Pandavas, or to get rooted like an immovable banyan tree to his paternal Hastinapur, thereby fighting for the prurient Duryodhana. The dilemma for Bhishma was that he knew Pandavas were on the path of truth, but he also knew that Duryodhana was the face of the kingdom by virtue of being Dhritarashtra’s eldest son. Lord Krishna had advised him not to divert from truth, but Bhishma ultimately took Duryodhana’s side in Kurukshetra and got laid in a bed arrows until death. This was the culmination of his one wrong decision despite knowing what was right and what was not.
Lord Krishna had later said that his job was to explain the right things to Bhishma, but the job of implementation was upto him. At the end of the day, decision making and assertiveness has to be the prerogative of the person who is suffering, although imparting enlightenment and wisdom is the duty of well wishers. The latter should be in no way held responsible for the miseries of the former, especially if words wisdom had not been hidden.
I guess, this philosophy is easier said than followed in actual life, but there is no doubt that this is the wisest thing to do. Hope I and all others like me can do the same and save themselves from unnecessary emotional disturbances. After all, detachment and performance of duty, and not the repurcussions of these, are the two pillars on which our religion stands, isnt’t it?
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